Alcoholics (1344 | sorted randomly)

So last night my wife walked into my den and I told
her "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and
fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the
plug."
That bitch unplugged my TV and threw out my beer.

 
79
 
1965 days
 
\_romi_/

If U Say Water, Tea, Coffee Or Juice; Your Lips Won't Touch Each Other!
But Try Saying Beer, Brandy Or Rum; They Touch!
So Get Drunk & Stay Connected.
Cheers!

 
526
 
1876 days
 
Rk3530

A.SOLID TRUTH IN LIQUID :-
.
.
.
''A bottle of whisky contains more philosphy than any book in the world...!!🍺

 
156
 
2230 days
 
Lushh

some test text

 
4
 
200 days
 
Test Mod VK

लडको का हिसाब किताब करने की क्षमता दारू पीते टाइम देखनी चाहिए..

सब के पेग में एक एक बूँद ऐसे बराबर देख के डालते हैं जैसे अमृत पी रहे हो।
😝

 
404
 
1367 days
 
Dev ;)

All my philosophy is borrowed from a bottle of vodka !!!

 
148
 
1614 days
 
dre@m_factory

For Sharabi Bros.

Sochea e c hun naio peeni mere dosto,
Sofi saari zindgi hai jeeni mere dosto,
na v kiti gai maitho jita jo chiz pyari da vaasta,
ik ik kardea ne Talli kr ta o de Yaari da vaasta..

 
35
 
2058 days
 
JS Pahwa Adv.

हम शराबी अच्छे हैं दुनियादार लोगों से,
हम ग्लास जरूर तोड़ते हैं लेकिन दिल नहीं..

 
438
 
1787 days
 
S-arcastic S-adist

Wife at the dinner table, "Please toast some bread for me".
The lazy husband raised his wine glass and said, "To bread!"

 
219
 
1733 days
 
Harsch

After having their 11th child, a Pakistani couple decided that that was enough, as they couldn't afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would fix the problem, but it was expensive. A less costly alternative was to go home, get a large firecracker, light it, put it in an empty beer can, then hold the can up to his ear, and count to 10.

The husband said to the doctor, "B'Allah!, I may not be the smartest guy in the world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me with my problem.."

"Trust me, it will do the job", said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a cracker and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count with his fingers: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5," at which point he paused, and placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue counting on his other hand.

This procedure has been approved by the Health Department of Pakistan.

 
271
 
2171 days
 
muks
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